Over a month ago, I broke my ankle, and I stopped doing almost everything that required me to move since I couldn’t take a single step – I still can’t. I realized how lucky I am to count on a support system helping me live and adapt to this temporal disability. I’ve been reflecting on how important it has been for me, particularly in this challenging time, to have this support network to keep going, growing, and developing not only professionally but most importantly, on the personal side.

It is hard to imagine and almost impossible to advance and develop without other’s people support. I am sure most of us have experienced the great feeling and effects when someone helps you to complete a task or when someone gives you that advice or comment you need to hear to keep going. What I am sharing is not a secret or something new; it is why people foster relationships, belong to groups, and build communities.

But, what is a support system?

A support system is a network of people that can provide you with practical and/or emotional support. It means that you have people you can rely on when needed. It means you have people you can lean on when you are in a difficult situation, whether at work, your career, or your personal life. A support system is composed of people, whether the relationships are on an individual base or with groups.

Individual relationships are present with your friends, family, relatives, neighbors, colleagues, supervisor, and those with whom you feel connected. It can also be present as a mentor/mentee relationship, where someone with more experience influences and guides someone with less experience. Tutorship is to teach or to instruct someone that is learning (it is more related to the educator/student relationship). And of course, there is Allyship -which by the way, it was the word of 2021- it is defined as the relationship between people, groups, or even nations to support and cooperate with one another for a common cause or purpose.

Support Group comes from groups you belong to where you share something in common. This could be a sports group, like a soccer team, a hobby group such as a painting class, a religious community, or emotional groups like AA, parents’ group. These groups share a commonality and exchange ideas and thoughts about the common topic. To get answers to personal questions or problems or get a better understanding of the subject.

Companies understand how useful it can be for employees to be part of a group where they feel connected with others by a topic, interest, or experience. That is why many companies have ERGs (employee resource groups) or affinity groups, which are employer-recognized workplace groups voluntarily led by employees. These groups allow employees with commonalities to meet, support each other, and ultimately to build community. Managed well, ERGs can add incredible value to the company culture and employee satisfaction.

I learned about the power of women affinity groups through Lean In. When I moved to the San Francisco Bay area over five years ago, I started meeting and connecting with amazing people, many of whom were professional Latinas. Unfortunately, there wasn’t a particular group for us in the Peninsula that I knew then. So I created our affinity group, the Latinas in San Mateo County. With time, many women joined, and it wasn’t only Latinas, so we created the Network Women in Silicon Valley to include all women. These groups have helped me and many others, to keep going (particularly since COVID started), where we support each other, exchange ideas, and tools to succeed both in the workplace and in our personal lives. The support we receive in our emotional and personal lives has been particularly important with all the challenges we have encountered since the pandemic started.

You probably have a support system, whether you are aware or not. You may have it defined, but if not, some questions to ask: Who is in your trusting network? What do you have in common, and how do they align with your values and aspirations? How do you nourish and strengthen relationships with the people and groups you belong to? Maybe you are a mentor, or you can ask for advice. Perhaps you are an ally or can identify some allies you have. Sometimes you are on the giving end, and sometimes you are on the receiving end. On either side, there is an excellent opportunity to connect and grow.

As a DEI practitioner and as a minority, I have experienced the power of having the support and being part of affinity groups time and time again. But with my recent incident of being unable to move, my support system kicked in, which has helped me through this difficult time. From having friends providing food and delicious treats to people’s understanding of my new pace at work, and how they keep helping me to get new projects and offer their advice. Last but not least, having emotional support during this challenging time has made a difference in how I react, increased my resilience, and made me stronger and more optimistic.

Having a support system is great, but it is not all. I also realized that there is another crucial step to know and practice: you also need to ask and be clear and specific about what you want, what kind of support or help you are looking for. Remember that people still can’t read minds, we need to ask for help when we need it. This last part has been particularly hard for me, to learn to ask for help and be humble enough to know that I can’t do it on my own. It is true, it really takes a village. We are not alone, other people are happy to help – I am positive we all like to serve- we just need to identify them and ask for the help we need!